A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Foru...err..Wormhole

Posted: Thursday, April 1, 2010 by Alathus Christensen in

During the week, as my play time is reduced, I've taken up that old mistress of missioning during the week as a gainful means of increasing personal assets. Returning to High Security space has been - to say the least - a shellshock. I find myself directional scanning mission hubs instinctively, only to cringe when my scan sheet is nearly ten pages of drones and wrecks. I wonder if I need to clear a corporate hangar so I can store my valuables. I still can't get used to these things they call "gates".

Living in null security space - be it actual nullsec or k-space - changes the way you see the game. It's a slow progression, but once complete the change is immediate and startling. I find myself missing the antics of k-space.

No doubt a lot of you have seen the old Penny Arcade cartoon explaining anonymity and the internet in one neat little package, but for those who haven't, I'll post it here:

Living in k-space, minus the audience of course, is a lot like getting to be the "Shitcock" guy all the time! Now, to some of you, this may not sound like fun. Maybe it even sounds like a bad thing. Some of you may even be saying, "Well, yeah! But I can be the 'Shitcock' guy in Jita, and then I even have an AUDIENCE!". True enough - but you don't get to have the fun we do.

In the interest of proving an argument, let me provide you - the objective reader - with an example. Earlier this week, we had a fairly profitable class 3 wormhole open in our space. As any corporation would do, we decided to take it for all it was worth - despite knowing there were a few people 'home' as it were. We'd previously scouted the inhabitants, and besides a Covetor (used to place warp disruption bubbles.. WTF?!) we'd seen nothing bigger than a frigate. Surely, no obstacle for the Drakefleet.

We brought in the Drakefleet, and began running their sites. Shortly after we began, the aforementioned CombatCovetor decided to place bubbles at all of the exits. We took a break, destroying the mobile warp disruptor on the wormhole back home, and continued. Moments after returning to site running, our scout reports that the pilots from the native POS have swapped ships to CovOps frigates. They both leave the POS forcefield, and cloak. The rest of us continue blasting Sleepers into oblivion, eagerly awaiting the inevitable scan probes appearing on directional.

Sure enough, a few minutes later, there's twelve combat scan probes on our screens, and we debate returning home and swapping ships to harass the scanners. Before we can do so, however, the scout reports that the two CovOps have returned to their POS. One pilot swaps to the Covetor again, and presumably safespots. The other pilot ejects from his ship, and decides to have a siesta inside the POS forcefield.

We continue cleaning up sites, and eventually our scout reports that the brave pod pilot must have become a bit paranoid. He's just changed the name of his pod to simply "Capsule", rather than "Arthur 231's Capsule". Lacking anything better to do, we decide to have a bit of fun with him, and the following is the result:

..Yes, we all renamed our ships to his name. Why? Because it was funny. He logged shortly after - like a heartbroken Superman who's just had his identity revealed. There are times when I hate k-space, when I hate the boredom that often comes along with it. Other times, I wouldn't trade it for anything in the universe.

Because Fuck Highsec,
Alathus Christensen